Week 9: Help, My Dog Won’t Let Me Cry
Let me rephrase, whenever I cry, Cody does this really cute thing where he runs up to me and licks my face, but he also happens to body slam me the way Entlebuchers do – with the force of a New Zealand rugby player. It’s a very effective way of stopping someone crying, kind of like doing a Heimlich maneuver. It has also inevitably conditioned me to suppress or disguise when I need to have a little cry. The other day I walked him after dark, he was being a very good boy walking on a long line, exploring all the smells and observing the shadowy outlines of ducks and swans on the water. Suddenly, I felt it closing in, the sorrow of Tilly’s passing emboldened by this familiar moment that I had with her in the same park.
Cody’s shadow walking in front of me perfectly resembling her own, as he is now just about the same size and a very similar build. Somewhere in the back of my head Lord Huron’s The Night We Met fades in with those soft vocals that grip the fragile place in your heart. I can feel my eyes welling up, I sit down on a bench to allow myself feel it all just for a moment. I barely exhale a first sob before my body gets tackled and face attacked with dog kisses clearing the two tears I just about managed to shed. For a dog that has been with us for two months he is already so fine tuned to us. No wonder, he is an Entlebucher after all. I can barely believe it’s been two months. It has gone so fast and yet it seems such a short period time considering how far he has come.
Cody has had a pretty strong and fun week. He got to meet our magic friend B on Saturday and instantly wished he could make a little den in her lustrous hair and move in permanently. He was completely smitten and kept coming in for more and more cuddles from his new auntie. He also loved being introduced to my trainer colleague and our wonderful friend Dorka after we finished coaching my puppy class on Sunday. As a much more knowledgeable trainer of all sorts of living creatures, she has become someone I lean on when it comes to finding a training solution when I get stuck or just want a different point of view. Some people ‘google’ advice, I turn to Dorka.
The other day when discussing our focus areas (a.k.a. things currently frustrating us) I remarked that we wish we could tell the two months ago ourselves how much easier it is now. If we could open a portal into early January, we would tell them: guys, he’s had no accidents since… well we cannot remember. It’s been that long! He has all his teeth and although he still tries to get his teeth on his bowl box his evening zoomies are ten times easier. I wish you could see how much more focused he is in training, and he licks his lips when he hears his marker word! He sits for things, and he walks on the lead very nicely most of the time! I bet the us on the other side of that portal with giant eye bags and stress veins sticking out on their foreheads would exhale loud with relief hearing this. We do not have that kind of power though and I thought to myself I will now think of the two months from now us as if I could open the future us portal. In that portal, I am told by future me with slightly longer less unmanageable hair that Cody gets a lot less frustrated seeing other dogs. Right now, he is screaming (or in entle-talk ‘rooing’) his poor head off at a sight of any dog, even if he looks like the Gmork from Neverending Story. You’d think he is not having any playdates, seeing the way he wails at a dog passing by. He has plenty and let me get back to that in a bit, because we do have some highlights from this week too! I would also tell my future self that he is even better now at settling down after his walks.
We have employed some great advice from auntie Dorka and we are already seeing results - I have no doubt future me will be seeing even more improvements. I hope that future me will appreciate all the work we have done so far with the first steps in separation. It is a very tough focus area with Entlebuchers because they effectively bind to you like you’re their newly discovered vital organ. To be honest that is all I would want to hear from two months from now me.
Cody is such a sweet boy. Very uncommonly for his breed he is super friendly with strangers, big and small. He loves saying hi to the little ones in prams and snuggles up for cuddles to anyone with fingers. He plays really well with other dogs but his playmates need to express a little bit of agency or he tries to overpower them. We have had a chance to observe Cody in play plenty this week. I should start by mentioning that Sunday was the best day ever! Cody and I were interviewed for a student project about living in London with a dog. Firstly, he was so well-behaved, and boy did he work the camera like a star. When we finished recording our portion of the interview, we went onto the park to record us and other local dogs hanging out. In words of Tristan, I flashed my Batsignal and the local dog community really turned up and impressed the young future filmmakers. Cody was in seventh heaven. I am dying to see the footage of my little boy so happy he could pee, if he had any pee left. He played for a good hour with lots of new doggy friends, learned more about himself and how he likes to interact with other dogs of different ages/sizes. Win!
On the flip side, we had a Monday walk that on paper was supposed to be lovely. I was dying to take Cody to the Beckton Nature reserve which is near us but is also a pretty long walk through the town before you get to see any nature. There is a bus that goes near there and I thought a bus ride on Monday during the day could get us closer to the fun bit of the outing. The bus nearly broke my spirit. As we readied to board, my dog training apron unclipped and fell to the floor spilling its contents. The onlookers getting on the same bus kept just staring at the confused dog attached to me as I scrambled and asked them to board before us. They still stared like they needed a tour guide to show them the door to the bus. Or a bodyguard to get him past a terrifying dog that looks like something from a cartoon. This is sadly way too common in our part of London. Historically and culturally conditioned preconceptions and bias make some of the people in London alienate people with dogs. It is not my place to educate on culture or religion so I will not digress on this matter, but I am always extremely pleased when humans who look like those people who normally avoid us come forward, say hi or interact with us positively.
We understand that for every good dog owner and trained dog there is an owner who does not conduct themselves with consideration to their environment and their dog for that matter. We can either close ourselves off in a silly xenophobic bubble thinking everyone around hates us and our dog, or we can change people’s opinion one at a time through positive and confidence building interactions with our dogs. The latter is my preferred option. It is not always easy as you can imagine. Some people are genuinely scared. Sometimes children are not actually afraid. They are 'pretend scared' Sometimes they scream: ‘the dog’s chasing me’ and start running from a dog that is walking calmly next to you.
They do not realise they are the ones inviting an interaction from a dog that was until that moment calm or apprehensive and who is now anxious or - if he’s Cody, now wants to play with the overgrown two-legged puppies. Now, where was I? Oh yes! Cody did like the walk once we survived the bus ride which was, put it mildly, from hell. He got to practice a bit of recall, and we got soaked in the rain together which was just a magical thing to share. This is not sarcasm. Cody’s fun week did not end there though, he got to play with local doggies from the other park who were extremely patient with the boisterous Entle-tank.
The greatest highlight from the whole week, since the previous entry is that Cody is now friends with Alfie. Tilly’s best friend. In their first introduction early on, Cody was a little unsure about Alfie because he was so excited at the mere sight of us with or without Cody. They got along great now and had a few amazing playdates outside and even one indoor. Seeing our Cody playing with the dog that is strongly linked to Tilly is so special. It is hard in a way but I am so glad he gets to have Alfie and his hoomum Harriet in his life. There are memories to be made, and we cannot wait to share them with Cody and all his new friends.
Until next time!